"I love cheese. I really do. When I was a skint backpacker I bought bread rolls and the 'laughing cow' cheese and some tomatoes which got me through Italy! Now I prefer a good Rocquefort or a soft, ripe, traditional camembert with some devine wine to compliment it! I'd eat any cheese. Absolutely any cheese! I love finding different varieties and I reckon there'd be a fair few at the Cheesefest which would put me in cheese heaven! Was that cheesy enough? No? How about this: I love you Eventfinder! I really do! xxx"
"When my friend and I were on our (rather extended) OE we made up our own language which was a bastardised version of all the languages we had learned 'some' of - Japanese, German, French, Turkish and Spanish! We made a lot of S%!T up...we thought we were hilarious...xx"
"I'm always up for a good old stomp, mixing it up with some bass lines and cranking up the energy! I'll stomp with the best of them! The main thing I'm stomping at the moment is the pavements due to a challenge laid out to do a triathalon! Agh! I'd rather be watching! xx"
"I'm always up for the 'Chicken Dance' but I'm also quite keen on a bit of Bossaball, followed by a touch of Wushu, some Tumbling Tightrope, a tad of Adagio, some Bossaball, sharply followed by crazy Contortion and Corde Lisse, some hooch-mama Hopak and performance Pole Climbing, some stunning Salto del pastor whilst Juggling, finally finished off with some Aerial Tissu around the Globe of Death...my perfect acrobatic ensemble!!! Easily pleased for a chicken! xx"
"Wow – reading all these stories about car bingles involving inferior downforce, faulty suspension bodyroll, destroyed crumple-zones, and dirty air resulting in vehicles getting collected, has given me much more appreciation for my own ‘Danny Marr’ and driving skills.
Driving my wicked ‘Jam Jar’ with its increased torque (from the double overhead cam shaft) and high Pfedestrarke’s gives me renewed gratitude for its performance and glad I’ve never had a prang!
Please send me and my husband to the Top Gear show!!! xxxxx"
"Ha! Kumbaiyah! Love it, love it, love it! I think I'd like to go dance party with Kumbaiyah in Brazil! Sounds like great fun! Actually, Brazil would have been my first choice too - so lively, so full of action and excitement - and the people know how to party!!! Bring it on!! Oh - and I'd like to go to Taranaki - no doubt there'll be the usual Brazilian suspects conjuring up a wee Capuera session for interested onlookers - almost like being there ay!"
"You have to see Justine Smith!!!! Cracked me up - brilliant comedy! Love it, love it, love it!!! Great to see such incredible local talent! Can't wait till the next show!!"
"oops...cut me off below...here's the rest!!!
HE HAD LEGGED IT WITH A NEWER MODEL – HENCE ‘I DON’T’). WE ENTERED THE PUB IN HIDEOUS PASTEL COLOURED 1980’S BRIDESMAID’S DRESSES ONLY TO BE MET BY ‘LESS THAN AMUSED’ LOCALS DRESSED IN BLACK SINGLETS, JEANS AND GUMBOOTS WHO APPEARED TO WANT TO ‘DRAG’ US OUT OF THE PUB RATHER THAN SEE US IN ‘DRAG’ – FOILED, YET AGAIN!!!
ANYWAY…PRISCILLA…NO DOUBT WE WILL FOI PAIS IN SOME WAY OR ANOTHER BUT…I CAN SAY FOR SURE THAT WE WILL BE HAVING A GREAT TIME REGARDLESS…WE HAVE LEARNT TO MAKE THE MOST OF A TRYING SITUATION!!!! MAYBE WE’LL GO AS CUPCAKES FOR THEIR ‘SOMEONE LEFT THE CAKE OUT IN THE RAIN’ ROUTINE? OR HOW ABOUT AS KANGAROOS, BOUNCING OUT OF PRISCILLA’S WAY AS SHE DRIVES UP TO ALICE, JUST TO SHOW OUR AUSSIE COUSINS THAT WE’RE GOOD SPORTS?
ALL THE BEST TO THE WINNER OF THIS AMAZING PRIZE! MAKE THE MOST OF IT AND HAVE A RAUCOUS TIME!! NICE ONE THE HIVE…LOVING THE LOOK OF THE ‘PERFECT DAY’ "
"MY FRIEND SAW THIS SHOW IN MELBOURNE AND ABSOLUTELY RAVED ABOUT IT! I WAS SO ENVIOUS UNTIL NOW – FINALLY NEW ZEALAND, OUR TIME HAS COME!!!!! WOOHOOO!!!
WHAT TO WEAR…OR MORE LIKE ‘WHAT NOT TO WEAR’ IN MY CASE!! MY MAD FRIEND AND I HAVE AN EMBARASSING TRACK RECORD OF WEARING ENTIRELY INAPPROPRIATE (BUT HILARIOUS) FANCY DRESS OUTFITS TO EVENTS - CHECK OUT MY PICTURE TO THE LEFT! THIS WAS US ON OUR WAY TO THE ‘HERO’ MASQUERADE BALL…WE WENT VISUALISING AN ALL OUT EXTRAVAGANT AFFAIR WITH CRAZY OUTFITS SO, COMPLETE WITH APENDAGE ON HEAD WE ENTERED THE ROOM AND TO OUR HORROR EVERYONE WAS DRESSED IN SOPHISTICATED ‘EYES WIDE SHUT’ STYLE ATTIRE!! THE OLD ‘APENDAGE ON THE HEAD’ GUY AND ‘SPARKLY PINK BUNNY’ GIRL DIDN’T QUITE FIT THE BILL! FOILED AGAIN!
WE ALSO MANAGED TO RAISE A FEW LONG-HAIRED EYEBROWS WHEN WE TURNED UP AT A BACK-ROAD, COUNTRY PUB FOR A FRIEND’S ‘I DON’T’ PARTY (IT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE HER ‘I DO’ WEDDING DAY UNTIL SHE FOUND OUT HE HA"
"A little boy is playing with his new football and a little girl asks if she can play. He tells her, “No. These are for boys". The little girl runs into the house and tells her mother. The next day the girl sticks her tongue out at the boy and waves her new football in his face. The little boy angrily points to his boy's bike and says, “Oh yeah? Well, only boys can get these!” But the next day, the little girl has the same bike. The little boy gets furious, pulls down his pants, points to his unit, and says, “Look, only boys have these and your mom can't buy you one!” The next day he walks by and the little girl promptly pulls up her dress, points to her bits, and proclaims, “My mother tells me that as long as I have one of these, I can have as many of those as I want”....girl power ain't gonna die!!"
"The award winner should be Justine Smith with her fast and smart wit! Never fails to have me in stitches - I love the way she describes circumstances in her life in such a hilarious way - great way to look at life!! She should definately win!"
on CheeseFest '10 2 years ago
on Southside Comedy 3 years ago
on Wayne Brady - Making S%!t Up (US) 3 years ago
on STOMP 3 years ago
on Le Grand Cirque 3 years ago
on Nostalgia by Ishinha (Auckland Festival 2009) 3 years ago
on Top Gear Live 3 years ago
on WOMAD New Zealand 2009 4 years ago
on Justine Smith : The Return of the Jussi 4 years ago
on Priscilla Queen of the Desert: The Musical 4 years ago
on Priscilla Queen of the Desert: The Musical 4 years ago
on Lindauer Comedy Divas 4 years ago
on Last Laugh 4 years ago